Sunday, December 22, 2013

The boyfriend's back,what a Hack

He's so cute, the boyfriend's back
As teenage girls, we will eventually discover
He's a bad lover, he's just a hack
I'm so happy the boyfriend's back

Mom tries to tell us, but as teens we know best
"But, Mom, he's different, not like the rest"
Famous last words
We think he's not from the same herd

Mom's were once teenage girls too
Daughters discover boys
What they really discover is hormones
What scientists call pheromones

Teenage girls find life can get hazy
What they mistake for love
Well, it's just being boy crazy
Teens think unemployed guy, is cute, not lazy

"He wants me, he wants me, it must be love"
Into his bed, he will give you a shove
Sex means love, am I right?
In an imperfect world, this logic soon takes flight

"But Mommy, you are wrong"
Such is the teenage girl in love's song
But as parents, we know she's wrong
Waiting for her to get it, can take ever so long

 Through the eyes, we call love
He always looks like, he's from heaven above
We think this guy fits like a glove
If we could only trust the eyes we call love

Girls get in trouble
Here comes the burst of the bubble
Dumb girls call it dumb luck
Even when they get hit by that Mack truck

When in trouble, where is this wonderful guy?
Oh no, he would not tell a lie
He once did a wonderful dance
Just before he convinced you he should be in your pants

I could be at death's door
Suddenly, he's not there anymore
He never cares if he hurt you to the core
You realize when you met, you should have shut that door

 But bad boys are such fun
Until push comes to shove
Oh see how he runs
Look at my tears, see my mascara run

Raising a child, well, just not in his plan
What a gem, what a peach
Oh, what a fine man
Now he says: "Catch me if you can"

What the hell, you now say 
He was a good man, when he wanted to play
He loved me, right from the start
Now he stabs you right through the heart

 Worse scenario, you're stuck with this guy
You know, the one who wouldn't lie
His faults, bad habits, seemed so cute
Now you need help, as a husband, he's mute

His bad habits drive me nuts now
In ten years, they get under my skin
What went wrong?
Well, where do we begin?

 Mom was with me when it all went sour
Where's Mr. Wonderful now?
Just look in any corner
You'll see him now cower

This great guy, somehow, he got lost
But now you discover
How great was your cost?
Before you started, he should have gotten lost

Never listened to my Mom
I simply told her to stay calm
But maybe Mom knew after all
When push came to shove, he'd never answer the call

Mom stayed by me, so never say: "Boo"
She was right about him
Maybe she's been around that same corner?
Well, Hell, whoever knew?

Mom said to be a strong girl
Hey, I know guys don't like 'those kind of girls'
But now, he has taken flight
Those 'wimpy' girls make me want to hurl

So listen to Mom, she just might be right
When a bad boy gets you into his sight
"In bed" he says, just laugh and say:
"Get the Hell out of my sight"